A realist - Jay

Kanav still likes to believe that Jay is his toy and so every morning he will wake up Jay to play with him. Jay, whose personality has been molded mostly by Kanav somehow lacks the outgoing nature of Kanav. Jay is a shy boy and does not mix up easily. As a 4 year old, he is extremely energetic and tires himself off.

But unlike Kanav, he is extremely particular about when he wants to eat food, what clothes he wants to wear and when he wants to sleep.  He has an ability to sleep even when there is a lot of noise around him. Even at this age, he is able to find matching clothes and if you offer him something to wear that he finds unsuitable, he can bring the house down. And when he wants food, he is extremely particular about what he wants to eat. Most of the times it is chapattis that he wants; even if everyone else is having rice.

Jay’s ability to resist temptations is so strong that you cannot change his decisions easily, even at this age. On Kanav’s birthday, Kanav wore a party dress to the school and a pair of party shoes. Jay has a similar pair of shoes (Black). He decided that if bhaiya goes to school like this, so would he. Preeti did her best to explain it to him that its Kanav’s birthday but couldn’t. So I took over and by fluke got him convinced to wear the school uniform but could not convince him to wear his school shoes. I could see his unspoken logic that, his party shoes were also black in color like his school shoes. But I wanted to test his persistence and he did not fail. He ultimately wore those party shoes even after everyone telling him that his teacher would punish him (which of-course she didn’t).

He is so particular about what he wants that I sometimes feel that he might grow up into an extremely selfish boy (but in positive sense). I see in him as someone who can prioritize things and has a natural aesthetic sense. Both of these attributes can lead him a long way. But what I am afraid of is his introvert nature. Even though I am like him, but my fear comes from him slowly slipping into an attitude where he does not show his feelings to others.

Almost a year back, I had slapped him for some severe mischief. While crying he asked me, ”Abb paari bhi kalo”.  But now if I say something which he does not like, he would simply sit quietly. And if I fail to recognize that he is angry with me, he would slowly start hitting you with his legs or arms. If I still don’t acknowledge, his intensity of hitting me increases until I pick him up and pat him with lots of love which ultimately cools him down.

Being angry with him or hitting him back does not yield any result for he is truly looking for being patted. I am afraid, that if he goes on a path where he suppresses his feeling and stops communicating, he is going to not only give himself but lot of other people close to him a hard time in future.

Jay is not as inquisitive as Kanav but follows everything that Kanav does. I believe that if we can keep guiding Kanav correctly, Jay would automatically inculcate some of the qualities of Kanav which he is currently not able to display.

While with a lot of belief, I can say that Kanav is getting groomed to be a dreamer, I can surely point out that Jay is intrinsically a very practical boy and would grow into a realist. Personalities that are poles apart, nature has brought them together.

Both brothers have so much love in them that I cherish every moment spent with them and miss them every single minute I am away from them.