I, very cautiously and with great effort have been able to control my anger over the years. But in the past few days this vice of mine has again started resurfacing. Though this has been a combination of multiple factors, I rather believe that it is more of a newton's third law in action.
As the maturity dawned on me in early twenties, my practical part overtook my emotional one leading to an emotional detachment with everyone around me. But Kanav has completed changed the equation with my attachment with the kid increasing day by day.
And with this love came the opposite - anger tagged to it. Any incident which causes hurt to my kid, this opposite emotion surfaces in a split second without giving me a chance to even thinking of controlling it.
When Kanav took a reverse fall from the bed today (with me and Preeti just beside him) and he started bleeding for the impact had resulted in his new upper tooth immersing in the soft lower gums, my first emotion was of a deep hatred for myself for I had been unsuccessful in protecting my kid. Next was an anguish towards Preeti for the same reasons. But when the kid came back in control, I and Preeti discussed this at length and realized that it was nothing but Newton's third law in action.
As I have said earlier that Kanav has brought about a plethora of changes in me, watching him grow is making me rediscover my relationship with my parents once again.
Whenever I get a chance I apologize to my mom and dad for all those years when I have been rude to them pointing their mistakes in my upbringing for I understand their sacrifices only now. Its only now I can realize the pain I used to overlook on their faces at my frequent outbursts and illogical behavior. I know that sooner or later I have to face the same, I will really pray to God to bestow me with the extreme patience which he has given to my parents to successfully cruse through that phase when it comes.
Amen.
Manish Saini
Monday, November 02, 2009
Kanav's Naughtiness - 7
Kanav is so fond of kids that even when he sees one in the television he gives his signature smile (with three new fresh teeth saying hello through his lips) and very cutely raises his eyebrows giving out a sound of "aaaaa" as if he is trying to call them.
These days I am reading The Anne Frank's diary whose cover carries a photograph of 13 year old Anne. Yesterday night when he saw the book in my hand, he gave in his best to snatch it out of my hands and started crying (as if he has been struck badly) non-stop till I gave in his new toy (Anne's Diary). But luckily his span of interest is limited for anything and soon turned to my mobile and left the book intact for me to continue.
Yesterday, Kanav gave us jitters when we realized that he now not only stands in the balcony and looks across the railing but has also started holding the extreme end of the railing and is doing his best to climb over it. A few days more and he will be expert enough to climb over it and we need to do our best to protect him from tripping over and take a 15 feet fall which might prove really fatal. So, I and Preeti have decided to start spending extra time looking over him and be with him every moment he is in the balcony.
Manish Saini
These days I am reading The Anne Frank's diary whose cover carries a photograph of 13 year old Anne. Yesterday night when he saw the book in my hand, he gave in his best to snatch it out of my hands and started crying (as if he has been struck badly) non-stop till I gave in his new toy (Anne's Diary). But luckily his span of interest is limited for anything and soon turned to my mobile and left the book intact for me to continue.
Yesterday, Kanav gave us jitters when we realized that he now not only stands in the balcony and looks across the railing but has also started holding the extreme end of the railing and is doing his best to climb over it. A few days more and he will be expert enough to climb over it and we need to do our best to protect him from tripping over and take a 15 feet fall which might prove really fatal. So, I and Preeti have decided to start spending extra time looking over him and be with him every moment he is in the balcony.
Manish Saini
Thursday, October 22, 2009
One Shot
Preeti was in for a complete surprise on her Birthday this year when I and Don threw in a surprise party for her at Don's place braving our laziness. But so was I.Don introduced me to one of his favorite fiction collections by Lee Child and offered me to read One Shot for a trial.
In my early reading days, I remember, I had loved Wilbur Smith's Time to die and Sheldon's Master of the game. I found One Shot to be as good as those and equally gripping.
A murder mystery, One Shot introduced me to Jack Reacher, an ex-military investigator who is in Indiana after coming across a news that there had been 5 random killings by a sniper - James Barr. Its a decent paced novel wtith multiple chain of events which unfold the mystery behind the killings.
The best thing about the novel was the character of Jack Reacher. He is a confident upright person with his set of failures in life. At certain instances, it seems to me that his understanding of the psychology of the other characters is a little overboard. But will still give Lee the credit of creating a wonderful charater in Reacher.
After reading One Shot whose mystery got me gripped to the novel, I have started thinking that of laying my hand on some of the Conan Doyle's books too for Sherlock is adjujed one of the best detectives. But for sure, I am going to read some more of Reacher of the Lee's collection of 13 novels.
Manish Saini
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Kanav's Naughtiness - 6
I was a 5 year old and loved to hear the sound of air being released form the tires and I had this habit of deflating tires of parked vehicles to enjoy the sound.
One day, as a habit I was deflating the tire of an ambassador sitting beneath it when the driver came and started the vehicle. To my luck or to the luck of my parents, someone saw me before the vehicle was driven away and alerted the driver. Knowing of the incident, my parents almost had tears in their eyes.
I remembered the whole incident throughout my life but never remembered those tears because I never bothered about that. I was just thrilled by the experience.
A few days back, when those tears reflected in my eyes, I lived the same experience but in the shoes of my parents this time.
Last Sunday evening, before going to bed, I was playing with Kanav when he picked something and put in his mouth. As a natural reaction, I asked him to spit it out and when I put my fingers in his mouth, to my horror, it was a piece of broken glass from a bowl which I had accidently broken that afternoon (though I had completely scrubbed the area, the piece was a surprise). Instead of scolding the kid, I hugged him tightly and tears started dripping my eyes. Knowing of the incident, Preeti had a similar reaction.
But her reaction was stronger the next day when she suddenly stopped hearing Kanav’s voice while playing in the balcony next to the kitchen. When she ran to the balcony, she found Kanav upside down in a bucked half filled with water. He had been hardly there for a second or two for Preeti is always extra careful but the site of her kid in this state was her worst nightmare in front of her eyes. She cried like a kid continuously apologizing from Kanav and promising to take his better care.
The two incidents back to back were quiet unnerving but have made us better and careful parents now. But more importantly, my love for my kid and my parents has increased manifolds.
One day, as a habit I was deflating the tire of an ambassador sitting beneath it when the driver came and started the vehicle. To my luck or to the luck of my parents, someone saw me before the vehicle was driven away and alerted the driver. Knowing of the incident, my parents almost had tears in their eyes.
I remembered the whole incident throughout my life but never remembered those tears because I never bothered about that. I was just thrilled by the experience.
A few days back, when those tears reflected in my eyes, I lived the same experience but in the shoes of my parents this time.
Last Sunday evening, before going to bed, I was playing with Kanav when he picked something and put in his mouth. As a natural reaction, I asked him to spit it out and when I put my fingers in his mouth, to my horror, it was a piece of broken glass from a bowl which I had accidently broken that afternoon (though I had completely scrubbed the area, the piece was a surprise). Instead of scolding the kid, I hugged him tightly and tears started dripping my eyes. Knowing of the incident, Preeti had a similar reaction.
But her reaction was stronger the next day when she suddenly stopped hearing Kanav’s voice while playing in the balcony next to the kitchen. When she ran to the balcony, she found Kanav upside down in a bucked half filled with water. He had been hardly there for a second or two for Preeti is always extra careful but the site of her kid in this state was her worst nightmare in front of her eyes. She cried like a kid continuously apologizing from Kanav and promising to take his better care.
The two incidents back to back were quiet unnerving but have made us better and careful parents now. But more importantly, my love for my kid and my parents has increased manifolds.
Wednesday, October 07, 2009
Kanav's Naughtiness - 5
5th naughtiness on 5th October. So Kanav had planned something special - His first complaint from neighbors.
Preeti was busy in her kitchen work when as a usual drill Kanav hushed up into the adjoining balcony. With an eye on Kanav, preeti continued. But there was an overlooking of hardly 30 seconds within which Laatsaahab picked up the stone scrubber and threw it from our first floor balcony which just missed our neighbor and her son.
As a natural reaction she shouted.
In the meantime preeti had apologized and realizing that it was a 10 month old kid, our neighbor also quietly whisked the subject away but not before instructing Preeti to take better care.
When Preeti narrated the incident in the evening, I was quiet thrilled to realize that my son has proved to be the real heir.
Love U Kanu.
Preeti was busy in her kitchen work when as a usual drill Kanav hushed up into the adjoining balcony. With an eye on Kanav, preeti continued. But there was an overlooking of hardly 30 seconds within which Laatsaahab picked up the stone scrubber and threw it from our first floor balcony which just missed our neighbor and her son.
As a natural reaction she shouted.
In the meantime preeti had apologized and realizing that it was a 10 month old kid, our neighbor also quietly whisked the subject away but not before instructing Preeti to take better care.
When Preeti narrated the incident in the evening, I was quiet thrilled to realize that my son has proved to be the real heir.
Love U Kanu.
Monday, September 14, 2009
The Last Lecture
Preeti once asked me my opinion on Gays and gay marriages and I told her sincerely that I don’t know for I can’t feel like them. Had I would, I would definitely told her.
The character of Rajesh Khanna in Anand who knew he is not going to survive more than 6 months because of an incurable disease was also a similar problem to me; for I was never able to co-relate with the Anand's character.
Later in the years I read a lot of books and articles to understand the dilemma’s of this character.
But for the first time I have read someone describing it as an engineering problem.
As engineering is not about perfect solutions; it’s about doing the best you can with limited resources.
Randy Pausch is a successful Professor who is suddenly in face with the approaching death. As a college ritual he decides to give a last lecture to his fellows and students but the only difference was that this lecture was not for the ones in the room. It was for his kids to watch when they grow up. On the unprecedented success of his lecture, which touched hundreds of hearts, he poured his complete lecture into his book – The Last Lecture.
The book has been a real revelation to me to understand Anand better. Even the my last article was the reason that the book has touched some cords deep inside me.
The book starts with a very promising introduction and some hard hitting and passionate writing. Randy describes life as a game of cards where “We cannot change the hand which has been dealt just how we play the hand”. He reviews his complete life to understand why he is, what he is. With the help of small fables, he talks about everyone who has touched his life and lessons he had learnt from each one.
Randy acknowledges that his life changing event was the lottery he won – The parent lottery. He was born with the winning ticket and that is what made the real difference.
As we enter the later half of the book, it becomes preachier and I started loosing interest but stopped here and there to enjoy the anecdotes.
Randy says that he was a brilliant salesman and that was the reason to join the field of education. Though the book is heart touching but difficult to read full out due to its preachier nature, I am sure Randy would have done a brilliant job in delivering The Last Lecture in which he packed the full stuff in an hour’s talk. I am currently downloading to check out the lecture.
Overall, I would rate this book as work giving a look for the litterary interest and read it for the passion of the author (at least the first part).
Manish Saini
Sunday, September 13, 2009
This one is for You!
I have tried to express this a million times but am always at loss of words. But after reading The Last Lecture by Randy, I know I really need to give it a shot NOW.
The days of our courtship were as lovely as they were thrilling for we have done some tremendous escapades together. It's been as amazing a journey as it has been lovingly eventful.
Now knowing each other for almost 6 years seem to be so less that both of us wish to have had met when we were kids and I am sure, even that would have not sufficed. The more I think of her, smaller the life seems to be. I don't know when the inevitable is going to happen but I really wish that I know it well before it happens (as Randy knew).
We have shared so much together between us; even a child; but still it seems like we have loved each other just a one by millionth of our capacity. We try to find ways and means to express this unknown feeling of ours but its so frustrating that we are mere mortals with unexpandable limits. Being always the practical(better) half she has accepted this and continuously teaches me in her own subtle ways.
People long for space in relationships, and so have I for so many times; but she really taught me that there is no space for space in ours. Had it been in her control, we would have spent every second together (and I really wish that God fulfill this dream of hers).
I am proud to let her bulldoze her way to get things done and arranged in her own way and I love the smile with which she lets me fulfill my long cherished desires.
When you find cheap toffees in our house, they are not for anyone to touch for she gets it especially for me to relish. When she lets me get wet in the rain, she knows how much I have been reprimanded for sailing paper boats in rain water and following them. When I want to watch a German/French/Foreign language movie, she sits next to me and tries her level best to concentrate and let me know that even she is enjoying it.
I don't want to thank her, but I really want to love the way she loves me and cares for me. I really wish this from my heart that let this be just the 1st of the seven births in which we are going to be together and God gives us the power to remember all the seven lives.
Nanu
The days of our courtship were as lovely as they were thrilling for we have done some tremendous escapades together. It's been as amazing a journey as it has been lovingly eventful.
Now knowing each other for almost 6 years seem to be so less that both of us wish to have had met when we were kids and I am sure, even that would have not sufficed. The more I think of her, smaller the life seems to be. I don't know when the inevitable is going to happen but I really wish that I know it well before it happens (as Randy knew).
We have shared so much together between us; even a child; but still it seems like we have loved each other just a one by millionth of our capacity. We try to find ways and means to express this unknown feeling of ours but its so frustrating that we are mere mortals with unexpandable limits. Being always the practical(better) half she has accepted this and continuously teaches me in her own subtle ways.
People long for space in relationships, and so have I for so many times; but she really taught me that there is no space for space in ours. Had it been in her control, we would have spent every second together (and I really wish that God fulfill this dream of hers).
I am proud to let her bulldoze her way to get things done and arranged in her own way and I love the smile with which she lets me fulfill my long cherished desires.
When you find cheap toffees in our house, they are not for anyone to touch for she gets it especially for me to relish. When she lets me get wet in the rain, she knows how much I have been reprimanded for sailing paper boats in rain water and following them. When I want to watch a German/French/Foreign language movie, she sits next to me and tries her level best to concentrate and let me know that even she is enjoying it.
I don't want to thank her, but I really want to love the way she loves me and cares for me. I really wish this from my heart that let this be just the 1st of the seven births in which we are going to be together and God gives us the power to remember all the seven lives.
Nanu
Wednesday, September 09, 2009
Kanav's Naughtiness - 4
Laakh pehre lagaa lo....But whatever has to happen will happen.
Kanav had already tasted a cockroah couple of weeks back. Today he tasted his shit too. I am sure his immunity becomes stronger from today onwards.
Kanav had already tasted a cockroah couple of weeks back. Today he tasted his shit too. I am sure his immunity becomes stronger from today onwards.
Kanav's Naughtiness - 3
Mom......I have won!If balcony's door is open.......its party time for Kanav. And if there is something new in there........phir to preeti ki shaamat hai.
The maid had left the pipe in the balcony after clenaing and when Kanav saw it, his first natural response was to have a taste of this new thing.
When Preeti tried to stop him, his resolve to defeat his mother became stronger.
He dashed towards the balcony and reaching there looked for his mom inside telling her, mom, I reached the balcony first; I have defeated you!
Kiddo.....may God be with you in all your Resolves. Your smile is worth living for.
We love You dear!
Manish Saini
Tuesday, September 08, 2009
Kanav's Naughtiness - 2
Days are like flying past. Another 2 months and Kanav will cross 1 year mark.
A few days back, he used to lie in my hands just blinking his eyes; and I eagerly awaiting for the day when I will be able to play with him.
Finally, The day for which I waited for 295 days arrived today.
I came back from office at around 8:10pm. Kanav was in Preeeti's arms, a little dull but recognizing that I am back, he closed his eyes, lifted his head at 60 degree and giving a big smile - his signature smile.
Preeti got busy in cooking food while I fed kanav milk and Russ. He slowly ate 2 russ and wanted more and even ate part of my ration. The diet infused in more energy in him and he started dashing towards the kitchen looking for some delicacies fallen on the floor. Exhausted from the long drive, I picked him up a couple of times and brought him back to the room.
This time while crawling towards the kitchen, he sat on the footmat infront of the bathroom and started smiling at me as if saying, dad I dodged you for my favourite place. I laughed with him and he responded quickly. I stood up to bring him back to the room.
Realizing, he picked up (crawling)speed to reach the kitchen; stopping on the way and checking if I was following and resuming at full speed.
I just loved the way he smiled back. Tired but smiling, I picked him and to reduce my effort, I gave him today's newspaper (his fav chewing gum). He tore a part of it, put it in his mouth, went to the door of the room and called me. When I looked at him, he gave me his signature smile showing me the paper. God he is just 9 and a half months. I stood up and ran behind him and the same sequence happened a few times.
I picked him up and played with him all sorts of games - throwing him in air and caching, tickling him, catching him while he crawled on the bed. His responses were amazing.
When Preeti gave him his daily dose of calcium syrup, he was completely unsatitated with 3ml and chased his mom with the feeding cap in one hand and the bottle in other to give him more.
I am amazed as to how the kid's brain is catching and analyzing things so fast. All these things which happened in the past 4 hours used to happen once or twice a day before this.
And as I am ending today's note, his mom is still strugling to make the kid sleep who was so dull at 8:10pm.
We love u Kiddo.
A few days back, he used to lie in my hands just blinking his eyes; and I eagerly awaiting for the day when I will be able to play with him.
Finally, The day for which I waited for 295 days arrived today.
I came back from office at around 8:10pm. Kanav was in Preeeti's arms, a little dull but recognizing that I am back, he closed his eyes, lifted his head at 60 degree and giving a big smile - his signature smile.
Preeti got busy in cooking food while I fed kanav milk and Russ. He slowly ate 2 russ and wanted more and even ate part of my ration. The diet infused in more energy in him and he started dashing towards the kitchen looking for some delicacies fallen on the floor. Exhausted from the long drive, I picked him up a couple of times and brought him back to the room.
This time while crawling towards the kitchen, he sat on the footmat infront of the bathroom and started smiling at me as if saying, dad I dodged you for my favourite place. I laughed with him and he responded quickly. I stood up to bring him back to the room.
Realizing, he picked up (crawling)speed to reach the kitchen; stopping on the way and checking if I was following and resuming at full speed.
I just loved the way he smiled back. Tired but smiling, I picked him and to reduce my effort, I gave him today's newspaper (his fav chewing gum). He tore a part of it, put it in his mouth, went to the door of the room and called me. When I looked at him, he gave me his signature smile showing me the paper. God he is just 9 and a half months. I stood up and ran behind him and the same sequence happened a few times.
I picked him up and played with him all sorts of games - throwing him in air and caching, tickling him, catching him while he crawled on the bed. His responses were amazing.
When Preeti gave him his daily dose of calcium syrup, he was completely unsatitated with 3ml and chased his mom with the feeding cap in one hand and the bottle in other to give him more.
I am amazed as to how the kid's brain is catching and analyzing things so fast. All these things which happened in the past 4 hours used to happen once or twice a day before this.
And as I am ending today's note, his mom is still strugling to make the kid sleep who was so dull at 8:10pm.
We love u Kiddo.
Monday, August 24, 2009
Kanav's naughtiness - 1
Kanav's crawling speed and stamina has increased and Preeti has grown slimmer. I sometimes share laughs with myself when I realize that within a few days Kanav will start walking. I am surely going to see Preeti as I have never seen before [:D].
To see him grow has been a wonderful experience for both, me and Preeti. He is showing a lot of promise as far as cerebral sharpness is concerned. However hard you try but no one can control his expectations from one's kid which just keep growing with him.
Kanav disagrees to sit and play on the bed anymore as he used to do 15 days back. You give him something to play on the bed, he will play for a minute or two and as soon as he gets bored, he will move to the edge of the bed and throw it on the floor and then innocently look at you as if he is saying - dady can you put me on the floor so that I can play with it. If you don't oblidge, he will swing his right hand as if he is saying - "main nahin...main nahin...". And still if your heart does not fall for the kid, he will make a sad smiley and will start crying while trying to get off the bed by himself (unsuccessfully).
While on the floor he his fond of going into the balcony and eat whatever rubbish he can gather before anyone of us picks him and pushes him inside. He then tries the doormat of the toilet which I now keep out in the balcony.
The thing which Kanav relishes the most is the paper, whatever be the size or taste, he just enjoys it.
But the best part is, he never swallows these rubbish. So it is easier for us to make out that he is having something beyond his diet which needs to be taken care of with immediate effect.
The day is not far when he is going to get off the bed all by himself. I am going to take care of all this stuff when I am shifting to a new house now.
Luv U Kanav
To see him grow has been a wonderful experience for both, me and Preeti. He is showing a lot of promise as far as cerebral sharpness is concerned. However hard you try but no one can control his expectations from one's kid which just keep growing with him.
Kanav disagrees to sit and play on the bed anymore as he used to do 15 days back. You give him something to play on the bed, he will play for a minute or two and as soon as he gets bored, he will move to the edge of the bed and throw it on the floor and then innocently look at you as if he is saying - dady can you put me on the floor so that I can play with it. If you don't oblidge, he will swing his right hand as if he is saying - "main nahin...main nahin...". And still if your heart does not fall for the kid, he will make a sad smiley and will start crying while trying to get off the bed by himself (unsuccessfully).
While on the floor he his fond of going into the balcony and eat whatever rubbish he can gather before anyone of us picks him and pushes him inside. He then tries the doormat of the toilet which I now keep out in the balcony.
The thing which Kanav relishes the most is the paper, whatever be the size or taste, he just enjoys it.
But the best part is, he never swallows these rubbish. So it is easier for us to make out that he is having something beyond his diet which needs to be taken care of with immediate effect.
The day is not far when he is going to get off the bed all by himself. I am going to take care of all this stuff when I am shifting to a new house now.
Luv U Kanav
Saturday, August 22, 2009
9 Months
Kanav recently turned 9 months old and it has been now one and a half years since he has been with us.
I have been through now 4 stages of emotional maturity (EM) and kanav's birth and growth is the 5th stage of my EM but is the most beautiful of all.
My best moment in the day is when I come back from office and he rushes towards me crawling and smiling full length.
He recently started saying papapapa which I really enjoy.
Time and again I am reminded of my fathers words when he said that "You will understand a lot of things about a parent and child relationship when you become a father". While I am really happy that I am realizing what he meant, I regret a lot of things I have said and done which have not pleazed them. I am sure Kanav will also tread the same line but now I am better prepared.
Luv U Kanav!
I have been through now 4 stages of emotional maturity (EM) and kanav's birth and growth is the 5th stage of my EM but is the most beautiful of all.
My best moment in the day is when I come back from office and he rushes towards me crawling and smiling full length.
He recently started saying papapapa which I really enjoy.
Time and again I am reminded of my fathers words when he said that "You will understand a lot of things about a parent and child relationship when you become a father". While I am really happy that I am realizing what he meant, I regret a lot of things I have said and done which have not pleazed them. I am sure Kanav will also tread the same line but now I am better prepared.
Luv U Kanav!
Monday, February 02, 2009
This is how we treat our National Heroes
We pay the kith and kin a pension which is outstanding by any comparison –
1. Rs 1500 to the one who is awarded Param Vir Chakra
2. Rs 1400 to the one who is awarded Ashok Chakra
3. Rs 1200 to the one who is awarded the Maha Vir Chakra
4. Rs 1050 to the one who is awarded the Kirti Chakra
5. Rs 850 to the one who is awarded the Vir Chakra
When the awards are disbursed on 26th January, not even a single person on the dias along with the President was seen applauding the Gallant warriors when the citation was read, leave apart saluting them for their selfless efforts..jpg)
Manish Saini
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Cloverfield
Start was not a bang. For the first 15 minutes Ranjith’s biased view was playing on my mind. But then when Ranjith shared his viewpoint about Slumdog Millionaire, I thought of discounting his opinion and thought of giving it a shot.
Made in a documentary style the film starts from a surprise party which is being captured in a camcorder by the protagonist’s brother and later his friend. 20 minutes into the movie, your head starts moving along with the video camcorder through which the events of the story are captured and viewed.
A kiddish concept of a monster movie (Godzilla, king kong etc….) has been portrayed in a very mature way. The director’s effort in making the audience live the experience of a monster attack is commendable.
There is no effort to give any dumb explanation of the existence of a monster rather this piece of art is unlike any commercial movie a pure and a sincere effort from the director to give creativity a free hand.
No less than 8 out of 10 is what this movie deserves for its shear brilliance of presentation.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
2 Years Later
While I was doing my routine exercises in the morning today, I realized how lucky am I to be in the ground. 2 Years back my hopes of again running had started fainted after my accident on Feb 11th when I had a major disc collapse.
For me it has been a miracle but for Dr. Shivaji it was a routine case which got in order with nothing but only some exercises.
For me the experience has taught me the real meaning of phrases like "Body is a temple", "health is wealth" etc. at an early stage in my life (though the lesson was really tough) and had not to wait for the old age to teach me.
Tough I am not as athletic I used to be 10 years back but I carry a very positive hope to recover 90% of my those abilities soon. And 20 years later when I revisit a post title "20 years Later", it would recount a very positive Journey Post Feb 2007.
Manish Saini
For me it has been a miracle but for Dr. Shivaji it was a routine case which got in order with nothing but only some exercises.
For me the experience has taught me the real meaning of phrases like "Body is a temple", "health is wealth" etc. at an early stage in my life (though the lesson was really tough) and had not to wait for the old age to teach me.
Tough I am not as athletic I used to be 10 years back but I carry a very positive hope to recover 90% of my those abilities soon. And 20 years later when I revisit a post title "20 years Later", it would recount a very positive Journey Post Feb 2007.
Manish Saini
Monday, January 12, 2009
The Curious Case of Benjamin Buttons
Fantasy is what this movie is called. But Fantasies are not as detailed as this one.
This is what I would call a “Concept Movie”. Fitzgerald thought of a simple concept that “What would happen if the human life was to move reverse – from old to getting young?” Had the concept been that we live in a world where everyone lives a reverse life – I would have definitely agreed to put this movie under the genre “Fantasy”. It would have been pretty easy to make a fantasy out of it.
Though I would have enjoyed the lighter part of it too (had it been included) – retiring at the peak of your health and touching the height of your career when you can actually enjoy it most. But the mood and tone of the movie did not allow taking it that path.
Manish Saini
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Coming to terms
To chose the name for my kid has been the most difficult work I have done till date in my life.
Kanav is not the best of all names but in the end I agree with Shakespeare.
Today he is 53 days old and me and Preeti are gonna remember this day throughout our life for an unexpected incident which happened just a few minutes back.
I was watching Apocalypto on Star movies intermittently watching it with Preeti's serial while Kanav was trying to sleep in her lap after his dinner/night dose.
With his eyes half open and half shut, he laughed and smiled like a grown up. He had done this few times in the past 50 days.
Being alone I just kissed him and told him (as he was looking in my eyes) "Baby, don't worry.....now you are with us, and we will make sure that we keep you happy throughout your life. Now we are your mom and dad baby and we love you and will keep loving you."
As soon I said, we are your mom dad........the hell broke loose. He started crying like he never did in the last 53 days. Not even when a week back he was given three injections in his thigh.
Preeti couldn't control herself. I thought it could have been because she suddenly realized that kanav does not believe she is her mother. But then it was mixed emotions - both the previous one and the also that a mother who sees her kid crying like mad dogs can't control herself.
I had to take the kid and make him realize that he was just a kid by playing with him like one.
A few days back I had just learnt that kids in the first 40 days can remember their previous birth and they see images from their past and talk to them.
My kid on his 53rd day is now coming to terms with his new found reality..................May God Bless his soul.
Manish Saini
Kanav is not the best of all names but in the end I agree with Shakespeare.
Today he is 53 days old and me and Preeti are gonna remember this day throughout our life for an unexpected incident which happened just a few minutes back.
I was watching Apocalypto on Star movies intermittently watching it with Preeti's serial while Kanav was trying to sleep in her lap after his dinner/night dose.
With his eyes half open and half shut, he laughed and smiled like a grown up. He had done this few times in the past 50 days.
Being alone I just kissed him and told him (as he was looking in my eyes) "Baby, don't worry.....now you are with us, and we will make sure that we keep you happy throughout your life. Now we are your mom and dad baby and we love you and will keep loving you."
As soon I said, we are your mom dad........the hell broke loose. He started crying like he never did in the last 53 days. Not even when a week back he was given three injections in his thigh.
Preeti couldn't control herself. I thought it could have been because she suddenly realized that kanav does not believe she is her mother. But then it was mixed emotions - both the previous one and the also that a mother who sees her kid crying like mad dogs can't control herself.
I had to take the kid and make him realize that he was just a kid by playing with him like one.
A few days back I had just learnt that kids in the first 40 days can remember their previous birth and they see images from their past and talk to them.
My kid on his 53rd day is now coming to terms with his new found reality..................May God Bless his soul.
Manish Saini
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
The gone year was pretty eventful especially towards the end both personally and professionally.
But the year ahead is full of challenges and hurdles which need an extra effort to scale. And for this I need to make a few promises to myself -
1. I would be more disciplined with my physical health.
2. I would make my family financially more secure.
3. I would spend "atleast", 5 valuable hours every day with my Kid.
4. I would professionally orient myself on a quarter to quarter operational mode
Though not very tough but still pretty challenging for me. Let us do a thorough revision at the end of this quarter.
Manish
But the year ahead is full of challenges and hurdles which need an extra effort to scale. And for this I need to make a few promises to myself -
1. I would be more disciplined with my physical health.
2. I would make my family financially more secure.
3. I would spend "atleast", 5 valuable hours every day with my Kid.
4. I would professionally orient myself on a quarter to quarter operational mode
Though not very tough but still pretty challenging for me. Let us do a thorough revision at the end of this quarter.
Manish
Sunday, October 05, 2008
Its been quiet a while since my last blog was deleted (reasons unknown). Since then it had been hard for me to find time to continue with some of my passions except for Movie watching with which preeti has been religiously helping me out every weekend :-)
("Ramchand Pakistani" is on today's agenda and I have read nothing more than the theme of the movie which I find to be interesting.)
Numerous times when I had come out of the Hall, I had felt so passionate about communicating my feelings but couldn't do it. Can't blame anyone.
But I thought that its high time to set the things right and so here is my first post after almost a year. The feeling to be back is really great.
And this time I am here to stay!
Manish Saini
("Ramchand Pakistani" is on today's agenda and I have read nothing more than the theme of the movie which I find to be interesting.)
Numerous times when I had come out of the Hall, I had felt so passionate about communicating my feelings but couldn't do it. Can't blame anyone.
But I thought that its high time to set the things right and so here is my first post after almost a year. The feeling to be back is really great.
And this time I am here to stay!
Manish Saini
Thursday, April 05, 2007
God's Debris
My reasoning and logical self always vexed me with hiding my inquisitive nature behind the shadow of my beliefs. For they are just a shadow, they tend to disappear in the light of knowledge.
I am not sure if these shadows are ever going to disappear but yes they do keep changing the sizes with every ray of the light of knowledge.
First few days on bed after a silly accident I was trying to keep myself busy when I get hold of a book by one of my favorite authors, Adam Scott. The book is freely available on the net here.
A small 132 page book presents the concept of God in a whole new perspective which has a lot of shades of Grey. Adam normally a man of few words represents a perspective of a normal man like me who is torn by limited knowledge and information.
This man believes that science does not have the answer to a lot of questions; but sooner or later they might get answered in future as have happened in the past. He also wants to believe in the omnipresent for reasons unknown (But I do attribute my set of beliefs to my parents). This man is not an extremist.
Adam has tried to give a scientific twist to the concept of God. But science still comes later. First comes is the Belief. For the science to exist, God must exist.
His book describes that we are all some minute parts of God who has destroyed himself and is trying to resurrect. To fulfill his desire we must act in a way which increases the probability of his resurrection which in a way supports the karma theory to an extent. Since the day I have read this book I have been seeing the play of probability all around.
Would recommend this book for those who want to have all perspectives of an argument.
I shall give this book 3.5 out of 5 for it is not a literary Genius but yes, the idea was fresh to me.
I am not sure if these shadows are ever going to disappear but yes they do keep changing the sizes with every ray of the light of knowledge.
First few days on bed after a silly accident I was trying to keep myself busy when I get hold of a book by one of my favorite authors, Adam Scott. The book is freely available on the net here.
A small 132 page book presents the concept of God in a whole new perspective which has a lot of shades of Grey. Adam normally a man of few words represents a perspective of a normal man like me who is torn by limited knowledge and information.
This man believes that science does not have the answer to a lot of questions; but sooner or later they might get answered in future as have happened in the past. He also wants to believe in the omnipresent for reasons unknown (But I do attribute my set of beliefs to my parents). This man is not an extremist.
Adam has tried to give a scientific twist to the concept of God. But science still comes later. First comes is the Belief. For the science to exist, God must exist.
His book describes that we are all some minute parts of God who has destroyed himself and is trying to resurrect. To fulfill his desire we must act in a way which increases the probability of his resurrection which in a way supports the karma theory to an extent. Since the day I have read this book I have been seeing the play of probability all around.
Would recommend this book for those who want to have all perspectives of an argument.
I shall give this book 3.5 out of 5 for it is not a literary Genius but yes, the idea was fresh to me.
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